Day 47

ON REFLECTION, THIS MAKES LITTLE SENSE.

BUT IT BEEFS UP THE POST SO IT SHALL STAY.

So sometimes.. I feel kind of immature when I start to question my gifts/talents/passions. 

When I start to wonder about where I'm going. 

When I begin to stress about what I'm going to do with the rest of my life.

Like I should be able to just "take it as it comes" or "go with the flow."

But I don't think I've ever lived like that.. and it's a concious decision..

I figure, life is this journey.. on which I'm trying to do right by Christ, and live for Him. 

That requires certain amounts of thought, right?!

I'm bound to stuff up and do wrong, just as I'm going to have to make tough decisions.. I guess I should stop. That is, stop feeling like I shouldn't think about things. Over-thinking situations is bad, and dwelling on stuff I should just let go is pretty dumb.. but overall.. I think with all the elements in my life that are beginning and ending and changing, i'm allowed a bit of thinking time. Yeah.

TODAY

I got up early, was running late, stayed back at uni to finish my assignment (nothing like a Thursday deadline to motivate you - haha) then got home, walked to the shops from the station, did the grocery shopping with mum, came home, cooked dinner, ate dinner, had half an hour to chill, spoke to Jo, sent some emails, then went to Jam sessions. Paul dropped me home, thanks (Y) now it's bedtime.

I'm so tired.

Uni is getting full on. 

I put in a fair effort today, the way I should most days and should have done all year.

Makes me sad to think that being lazy and unmotivated has come so easily to me?

Looks like the plan for the end of the year will now include a holiday, possibly most likely to QLD with the family!

So I finish Civic in early December, the holiday may be then for about a week, or if not I'll just have a few weeks til Christmas. Then there's another week, New Years, then TRSUFM for 2 weeks down at the Prom, come back, it's January 16th, if the QLD trip hasn't happened already it will happen then.. 

And by then it will be February.

So no point applying for jobs now, seeing as my first month, I'll be unavaliable. 

Scary.

I'll have no income for something like 2 months.

I don't think I'll survive.

I have no savings.

I'm freaking out already.

PLAYLIST OF CHILLED OUT, REFLECTIVE LOVE.

Song for Milly Michaelson - Thrice

Come All Ye Weary - Thrice

Silver Wings - Thrice

Moving Mountains - Thrice

PRETTY PICTURES! (BECAUSE YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MANY)